Saturday was a big day.... Ri turned 4 years old. It is so hard for me to believe he is 4 years old already. And oh how much he has changed! He is such a joy to all of us. His giggle is absolutely contagious. I think that is one of my favorite things about him. He is still as resilient as ever. I think he has a strength that runs far deeper then most adults. It's as if he looks trouble in the eye and says "I've been through worse... bring it on!". He has an incredible spark about him. The things that he says cracks me up. Sometimes, I am simply in awe that he is our son.

His favorite color is orange. I am not so sure that it truly is his favorite, but it is the one color he knows. His favorite toys are matchbox cars. He still loves to have books read to him (a goal I have set to do more of this year). One of his favorite things to do is take a bath. He loves to take small toys and carry them everywhere he goes and then find something to stuff them in. He is as curious as they get and can't hardly keep his hands off anything that catches his eyes. It is near impossible for him to not open something if he wants what is inside. He absolutely adores his siblings...every single one of them! He is still an excellent imitator and even better teaser! He knows his ABC's (sounds and lettes) and he can count to 12. He was passed out of his speech class because he was doing so well. Developmentally, I think he has nearly caught up with his peers. There are still some areas that he struggles in, but all in all... he is doing fantastic!

Happy New Year

Jacob's New Year tradition is to dump a bowl of water on his head and then run around the house the number of times the new year is... in this case... 9. At each lap, Mark set off firecrackers. He is so much fun to watch. He gets so very excited. At the stroke of 12, he dumps the water and Mark lets off fireworks.

Elizabeth's favorite present was this baby doll. Mark wanted me to find an asian doll for her. I saw this one the very next day. I couldn't believe it looked so much like Elizabeth!

2009... it's the beginning of a new year. For the Miller Home, New Years Day is probably one of the most precious days of the year. We hold a tradition unlike many others. For our children, New Years is much like the celebration of Christmas for so many others. We do not celebrate Christmas in our home. We never have. I grew up celebrating Christmas, though the birth of Christ was rarely a part of it. Mark grew up never celebrating Christmas, though the birth of Christ was the most important thing to he and his family. Odd how things are sometimes. I was not a christian, but Christmas was the absolute most precious day of the year for me. Mark was a strong believer in Jesus Christ and Christmas meant nothing to his family. Understanding it all is far more complex then I am able to write down.

As for our children, they love Christmas. They recognize it for what it is. They rejoice in the birth of Christ and love a day set aside to remember His birth and what his birth means to us. They look forward to the day spent with my parents and often a season that includes visiting with their cousins and Aunt and Uncle from Florida. But as for New Years... it is something they look forward to more then any other day.

Over the years, it has become a precious day to all of us. In the morning, the kids are excited to see the many presents that await them. But before we begin the "festivities", we sit down as a family and reflect on some things or ways that we have seen God in the previous year and spend some time purposely reflecting on the New Year with God being the center. It is my favorite time of the morning. And for some reason, this year was far more precious to me then any other year. I think mostly because it is such a time of uncertainty. We were honest with the kids about the uncertainty of the economy and what the future holds. Oh, we never know what the future holds, I know that... but entering into 2009 seems far more uncertain with the economy that our country is currently facing. So, our reflections became such a precious time of taking our uncertainties and reminding the kids to lay them at the foot of the cross..... reminding them that no matter what God chooses to allow to come into our lives, He is in control and He is the one who will hold us through it all. There is such a peace in that understanding.

We look forward to a new year. For some of us, 2008 was a time we don't mind setting aside and moving on. Jacob and I both agreed that 2008 was not filled with great memories. Oh, don't get me wrong, there are wonderful things that happened and I wouldn't trade many of them at all... but I struggled with my walk with the Lord. As for Jacob, it was the hardest year of all. Much might be do with the changes that go on during this time of life for a 12 year old. But, he and I both agree that much of the difficulty for him has been the relationship that he and I have had. I have not been there for my son like I use to be. I use to be Jacob's "safe haven". No matter what he was going through, he knew he could count on mom's loving touch to make it all go away. But since the addition of Ri combined with my off and on walk with the Lord, Jacob has been on the end of my wrath far more then any gentle soothing touch. It wasn't until this past month that I finally opened my eyes to see what I had been doing to him. It finally dawned on me how hard I have been on him. And... by the grace of God, we had a talk about it. Both of us are looking forward to saying goodbye to 2008 and hello to a new year and .. hopefully... a restored relationship.

Some of our highlights from 2008 are Jacob's Washington trip, Emily becoming a Senior in high school and her trip to Philidelphia, Sam's trip to Poland, and Erin's soccer camp and homecoming experience. There are far more highlights to mention, but these are some that are burned into our kids memories. For me, I think the most important highlight is the bonding of Ri and I. He truly became my son in 2008! Some other memories that come to the top of my head: the price of gas!, Mark diagnosed with skin cancer, lots and lots of senior pictures, Marks parents celebrated 50 years together, our pastor moved away, Uncle Paul became the pastor of a church in Radnor, Sam started high school, my girls had their first official dates and my son longs too, the election of Obama and the uncertainty of our country, my neice graduated from High School, Emily spent 2 weeks in Florida babysitting, realizing that I have a senior in high school!, Erin got her drivers license.

There is much more to write, but time has gotten away from me.

It is hard for me to believe that I have let nearly 2 weeks go by without updating. My last update was on Wednesday, December 17th. December 18th hit and it has been a blur ever since. December 18th was our appointment to the nephrologist for Elizabeth and Ri's ultrasounds. We met with him and all agreed that Ri did not need an ultrasound done. The doctor had not planned on doing one for Elizabeth, but after talking with us, I think he decided it would ease our mind to actually run an US just to make sure nothing was there. We scheduled that for Monday, December 22. And.. as the doctor anticipated (and I had pretty much been at peace about), there were no evidence of any kind of damage to her kidneys. So... we praise God that despite the fact she had been on the formula that recently was tested with an astronomical amount of melamine.... she was not effected by it (or it had not been in her formula at the time). The anemia is a direct result of the genetic blood disorder that we discovered a few weeks ago called Thalessemia. The stage 1 hypertension that she seems to record may or may not be real. It certainly can be a direct result of something called "White Coat Syndrome"; meaning that her blood pressure rises just because someone is doing something to her (taking her blood pressure).

That evening (at 11:30 at night), my sister-in-law and neice and nephew flew into town. Oh how wonderful it was to see their faces. It has been a year and a half since I have seen them. I was so looking forward to their visit, despite how short it was going to be. My brother flew in the next day. Friday night, Emily woke me up with the stomach flu. It was quite violent. Three hours after she woke me up, Jacob joined us with the same flu. We were up the entire night, alternating between the 2 kids. It was a very, very long night. Emily had been hit harder then I remeber her ever having the stomach stuff! That meant that all Saturday, she was quarantined from her cousins. She was devastated. Her Uncle was only in town Friday night and Saturday. He left at 5:30 am Sunday morning. She had looked so forward to spending time with him. We tried to recover some from the lack of sleep. Sunday night Sam ended up with the same violent night Emily had had. So, we canceled Monday's appt. My sister-in-law took the older kids (minus Sam) to Columbus shopping and to movies. I stayed home with Sam. Monday night, Erin and Mark got it. My Brother got hit a few hours after he landed in Florda. My sister-in-law and neice and nephew left Tuesday. Faith got it that night and Eli got it the next night. Ri ended up with it Christmas night. Elizabeth and I were spared. Ri, Elizabeth and I all had the flu shot. I am praising God for that! I was in the thick of the virus for a week straight!!!!

So... with many nights of little sleep, I just haven't had the energy to update! Keep checking back.. I will post more in a little bit. I have kids calling me.

For those of you checking in today....DON'T GIVE UP ON ME!! It has been a long week or so and I haven't had the energy nor taken the time to update. I am in the process of updating and should be up in a little bit.

Today I was blessed so much I wanted to share. Well, I guess I am blessed everyday and should share it everyday, but today God simply reminded me of my blessings. Elizabeth hid in our closet. She is cute when she hides, and... unfortunately, sometimes too good at it. There have been times that she has scared me to death because I can't find her anywhere and she stays so quiet that I really have no clue where she is! But this time, I knew. After a little while, she popped out with a big smile on her face, holding several coins in her hand. She proudly announced what she would do with this new found money. I would have expected her to say she would buy something for herself. But, no... she smiled and said she was going to give it to church. It was so sweet and she was so excited about being able to give her money to church. I thought for a moment about what she was saying. Then I felt guilty. There is a little "church bank" that kids in Sunday school put money into if they bring it. I have really only seen one little girl put money in. I had never thought of teaching Elizabeth and Ri, so young, the concept of giving money weekly. We have taught our kids the importance of tithing, but not until they began earning money of their own. How tender it was to hear Elizabeth wanting to give without really understanding much about it!

Then, a few hours later, she came down the stairs holding a beanie baby (beanie babies are her favorite things to play with these days). She announced that she was going to wrap her animals up so that she can give them to people so they could play with them and make them happy. She was very excited about it. So... I imagine we might be finding a few special toys and giving them away :) How fun is that?

Sam and Erin had a concert last night. I decided it was about time that I took a video of them at their concerts. I really enjoyed this piece. It is the recital of Twas the Night Before Christmas. At each pause, the band interjected a piece that went along with that part of the story. It was fun to listen. By the end, you caught yourself trying to guess what music they might choose for the words that were just recited. I didn't want to run up close to take the picture, so it is pretty far away. Sam is to the right of the horn that is pointing in the air in the back. He plays the trumpet.

Erin is in the symphonic band (I believe it is much like the varsity of sports, though I am not 100% sure on that). They played Silent Night for us last night. Erin is the first girl sitting down on the left.

There is much that goes on in our home, mostly chaos and confusion... but lots and lots of it. :) I wouldn't change it for the world, unless, of course, I am grumpy, tired, or hormonal! It's then that my mind gets a little fuzzy and I whine and complain about my wonderful life! How pitiful I am at times! A friend reminded me yesterday of the precious gifts we have, even when the house is dirty, the laundry is piled high, the carpets are a mess and dishes are strung throughout the house. A family from their church lost a large part of their home, as well as many precious possessions, to a fire. Sad to say, but it sometimes takes a tragedy to get my attention and remind me of how truly wonderful even the mundane things of life really are.

Another friend sent me a forward (of which I usually despise) that made me think. It was supposedly something written by David Letterman. Who knows the truth behind the author, and honestly, who cares. It was another reminder of my life and the blessings surrounding it. The following is long, but it is the "letter" I received in my email. If you take the time to read it, you might find yourself in the same spot I did after I was done.... thanking God for my life and the freedoms that I have in this country.

supposedly written by David Letterman
' As most of you know I am not a President
Bush fan, nor have I ever been, but this is not
about Bush, it is about us, as Americans, and it
seems to hit the mark.

'The other day I was reading Newsweek
magazine and came across some Poll data I found
rather hard to believe. It must be true given
the source, right?

The Newsweek poll alleges that 67
percent of Americans are unhappy with the
direction the country is headed and 69 percent of
the country is unhappy with the performance of
the President. In essence 2/3 of the citizenry
just ain't happy and want a change. So being the
knuckle dragger I am, I started thinking, 'What
are we so unhappy about?''


A.. Is it that we have electricity and
running water 24 hours a day, 7 Days a week?


B.. Is our unhappiness the result of
having air conditioning in the summer and heating
in the winter?


C.. Could it be that 95.4 percent of
these unhappy folks have a job?


D.. Maybe it is the ability to walk
into a grocery store at any time and see more
food in moments than Darfur has seen in the last
year?


E.. Maybe it is the ability to drive our
cars and trucks from the Pacific Ocean to the
Atlantic Ocean without having to present
identification papers as we move through each
state?


F.. Or possibly the hundreds of clean
and safe motels we would find along the way that
can provide temporary shelter?


G.. I guess having thousands of
restaurants with varying cuisine from around the
world is just not good enough either.


H. Or could it be that when we wreck
our car, emergency workers show up and provide
services to help all and even send a helicopter
to take you to the hospital.


I.. Perhaps you are one of the 70
percent of Americans who own a home.

J.. You may be upset with knowing that
in the unfortunate case of a fire, a group of
trained firefighters will appear in moments and
use top notch equipment to extinguish the flames,
thus saving you, your family, and your
belongings.

K.. Or if, while at home watching one
of your many flat screen TVs, a burglar or
prowler intrudes, an officer equipped with a gun
and a bullet-proof vest will come to defend you
and your family against attack or loss.

L.. This all in the backdrop of a
neighborhood free of bombs or militias raping and
pillaging the residents. Neighborhoods where
90% of teenagers own cell phones and computers.


M.. How about the complete religious,
social and political freedoms we enjoy that are
the envy of everyone in the world?


Maybe that is what has 67% of you folks
unhappy.


Fact is, we are the largest group of
ungrateful, spoiled brats the world has ever
seen. No wonder the world loves the U.S. , yet
has a great disdain for its citizens. They see
us for what we are. The most blessed people in
the world who do nothing but complain about what
we don't have, and what we hate about the country
instead of thanking the good Lord we live here.


I know, I know. What about the
president who took us into war and has no plan to
get us out? The president who has a measly 31
percent approval rating? Is this the same
president who guided the nation in the dark days
after 9/11? The president that cut taxes to
bring an economy out of recession? Could this
be the same guy who has been called every name in
the book for succeeding in keeping all the
spoiled ungrateful brats safe from terrorist
attacks? The commander in chief of an
all-volunteer army that is out there defending
you and me?


Did you hear how bad the President is
on the news or talk show? Did this news affect
you so much, make you so unhappy you couldn't
take a look around for yourself and see all the
good things and be glad? Think about
it......are you upset at the President because he
actually caused you personal pain OR is it
because the 'Media' told you he was failing to
kiss your sorry ungrateful behind every day.
Make no mistake about it.


The troops in Iraq and Afghanistan have
volunteered to serve, and in many cases may have
died for your freedom. There is currently no
draft in this country. They didn't have to go..
They are able to refuse to go and end up with
either a ''general'' discharge, an 'other than
honorable'' discharge or, worst case scenario, a
''dishonorable' ' discharge after a few days in
the brig.


So why then the flat-out discontentment
in the minds of 69 percent of Americans?


Say what you want but I blame it on the
media. If it bleeds it leads and they
specialize in bad news. Everybody will watch a
car crash with blood and guts How many will
watch kids selling lemonade at the corner? The
media knows this and media outlets are for-profit
corporations. They offer what sells, and when
criticized, try to defend their actions by
'justifying' them in one way or another Just ask
why they tried to allow a murderer like O.J.
Simpson to write a book about how he didn't kill
his wife, but if he did he would have done it
this way......Insane!


Turn off the TV, burn Newsweek, and use the New
York Times for the bottom of your bird cage.
Then start being grateful for all we have as
country. There is exponentially more good than
bad. We are among the most blessed people on
Earth and should thank God several times a day,
or at least be thankful and appreciative.' 'With
hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control, mud
slides, flooding, severe thunderstorms tearing up
the country from one end to another, and with the
threat of bird flu and terrorist attacks, 'Are we
sure this is a good time to take God out of the
Pledge of Allegiance?'

David Letterman

I haven't posted in such a long time. Time just seems to slide right past me!
BOth Ri and Elizabeth are really into singing songs. Jacob is incredible! Nearly everytime he is in the car with them, he sings for them. They absolutely love it!! In fact, Elizabeth asked DAddy and I to sing for her. At the end, she proudly announced that Jacob was the best singer in the whole world! It was adorable. So, this afternoon, I asked the kids if they would sing for me. Ri chose this one:



Here is a video of the song Elizabeth chose to sing, though dark and a little hard to distinguish. I loved it just because Elizabeth spontaneously responded to the words. It was adorable.
This afternoon I caught Ri playing with the camera. These are the results of his and Elizabeth's "photo shoot". I have much to write about, but little time for right now. I just wanted everyone to know that we are well. I haven't blogged lately because of frustrations with my keyboard... but my wonderful husband fixed that last night. I promised him I would blog some today. The only problem is that we were gone all morning for speech and preschool and I have a completely destroyed house for the moment that needs cleaned.

Three years ago today!

It is so hard to believe that 3 precious years have gone by already. Three years ago today, we were in China "giving birth" to our daughter/sister, Elizabeth Qian Jiake Lee Miller.




Here is the movie I had made for the gotcha day for both kids. Elizabeth's is the first 5 minutes.


As I reflect on my thoughts and feelings, I have gone through some of the pictures and moments of Elizabeth's "birth" into our family.







Our first family picture.

Not only did we gain a new family member, we gained friends forever. These are the families that adopted girls from Elizabeth's orphanage. In many ways, they were like sisters. The bond we share with each of the families is one that will never be broken.
This is Emily Rose's family. We have not stayed in touch like I wish we could. We spent a great deal of our time in China with them. They are precious.
Sophie May joined the Cross family. Renee and I have a precious friendship. Though we don't talk all the time, when we do, it's as if we have been friends forever.
And this family? Wow! What can I say....but that God truly blessed us when we met them in China. We have physically only been around each other 3 weeks in 3 years. But the bond we share is INCREDIBLE. They truly are our forever friends.








This morning, I revisited some of my journaling. For those interested, here are some of my entries:

Gotcha Day
Things are pretty crazy right now, so I can not blog what I would really like to write. I will a little later. But, I know that there are many of you who are imediately on this morning to check out if we got her.

We got to see our baby at 3:00 this afternoon. (2:00 am your time). She is the cutest of them all (hee, hee). We walked into the civil service office and there sat 5 babies in yellow walkers. We recognized her right away. We were immediately taken into a room and waited for them to call for us. Clay asked for us all to pray together. All 5 families circled together and prayed. It was precious. As soon as Clay said amen, they came in the room. How cool isthat? They called us out and began calling names of families. The Cross family recieve their little girl first. She is precious! Then came the Mears and Masyr families. Then us. They handed her to me. She just looked at me. It was a moment that was unforgettable. No crying, no smiling, no expression at all. She played with my glasses and my cheeks. Then it was crazy from there. Mark took her, then Emily, then Erin, then Sam, then Jacob. We had pictures taken of Mark and I and Elizabeth. Then they took our fingerprints and put us in the room. We met a nanny and were told about the babies schedules.

Enough of that, I will give details later. I am tired. I just wanted you to know a little more about her. We absolutely are in love. She is still quite tiny. She fits in a 6-9 month outfit right now. She has much more hair now. I am confident that she does have mongolian spots. Her back is pretty covered, the kids thought she was horribly bruised. I am thankful that I heard about the spots before we got her. I would have panicked. SHe has a stripe around her ankle and on her wrist as well. Just above her eye she looks somewhat bruised. I dont know enough about them to know how long she will have them or if they will go away. But I do know that it won't matter to us either way!

She has not given us one expression since we have had her. Mark and I are a little concerned, but expect that eventually she will make some expression. We are dying to see her smile. Her little face has stayed the same way...though her eyes are searching and wondering. She has to be overwhelmed and very, very confused. I am just very thankful that she is not terrified! Can you imagine the change that has just gone on for her in the last 3 hours?

Well, I need to go. The hotel room is a disaster. We were missing much and had to searh 12 bags to find everything we needed to go get Elizabeth. We only had 1/2 hour to do it. It was nuts! I need to pick up.

We loveyou all!
Darcy


A few days later, I journaled my thoughts about Gotcha Day


Good morning everyone. Mark and the kids are all at the park. I am here, alone with Elizabeth. What precious time this is. She just fell asleep, so while she is sleeping I wanted to take a chance and share with you some of my thoughts. As I stared into her precious face and she looked back at me all I felt was the same oneness that I felt with my other four when they were little. It hit me that this child truly is my child. Her birth was different, but I feel like I have been pregnant with her longer then with the others. I was overwhelmed with thanksgiving for such a privlidge. I am so thankful to this country and their allowing us to come and adopt her. I thought about how we would feel if 100's of Chinese or any other country for that matter came to America to adopt our children. What would we think? I was ashamed at my initial secret thoughts. I honestly think it would have bothered me... at least up until now. I think I would have resented them and felt badly for the child who would no longer have the USA heritage. It was then that I realized how gracious the people here are.

I guess I realized that it wouldn't be surprising for them to be angry and to talk badly to us.... but instead, noone has been mean or angry. Almost everyone is full of smiles and joyful. Some are curious, but even they are kind and gracious to us. They probably stare in amazement or wonder or joy.. who knows? I think many have expressed their deep happiness for the baby and for us. Some have said "lucky baby"... to them I reply, "No, lucky us".

This is the first time that i have had the alone time to really ponder. OH, hOw deep these feelings run.

I never shared with you the gotcha day moment. I hope to share some now. Sam video taped most of it. We laughed and cried through it. I think I was more numb then anything. I was nervous, excited, but nothing what I thought I would be. I was taking it all in. I thought my heart would be jumping out of my skin. I thought I would cry and laugh and not be able to breath out of excitement. But instead, my heart was full of joy and saddness all mixed together. I think my emotions were so overwhelmed that the only response I could have was numbness. Like the birth of a baby, you anticipate it for so long until finally that day comes. As a mom, you are so involved in the delivery, that you really don't have time to become emotional or think. It is all so exciting. For Elizabeth, we had 16 months of waiting for her, 3 plane rides and 4 days in China just waiting. The wait had been so long and so emotional.

Before we went to get our babies, one parent had to meet with Amy and Kevin to sign paperwork. THat parent was me. It was then that we got to see a new picture of our little ones. I was so excited and couldn't wait! I was the last to see her face. My heart was pounding until I saw her. My heart saddened. I don't know why. But I saw her face and got very sad. It was an unexpected feeling. I was shocked. I couldn't tell anyone for fear that maybe I was disappointed in what she looked like or something, though I didn't think I was....maybe that is why I was numb. It wasn't until today that I realize why I was so sad. The other babies were smiling and happy and cute. Elizabeth was sad and frightened. I think I felt such pain for her at that moment and fear that she would be frightened with us. I felt the trauma that she would be going through leaving the only home she knew and coming into our family.. foreigners in every aspect. In one moment her little life was going to be turned upside down. That look on her face broke me. I fight tears as I write this because for the first time I am realizing what I felt.

What was I going to put her through? My baby that I had prayed for for so long? The pain in her eyes was devastating. Yes, that is why I was numb. Well, fast forward to the moment we got to the Civil Affairs office. ...

The bus pulled up and everyone was so excited. They were trying to get there first. We just lagged behind. I didn't mind being last. I was nervous. Everyone got upstairs and we were the last to get in the elevator. We were the last to see the babies. In fact, we could hardly see them because everyone had crowded in. I seached the 5 babies and thought I saw her. Again, that sad look on her face. It was a look of bewilderment and sadness, not fear. We were not able to look at the babies anymore, but asked to move into a room and wait until they brought the babies to us. Again, when we went into the room, we worked our way to the back. Everyone wanted up front to be the first to see the babies. We waited for a little while. Clay asked if we oculd pray together. We gathered into a circle and prayed. It was priceless. The emotions were strong and I fought them. Then they told us it was time to get our babies. We went back into the front area. I thought it would be somewhat ceremonial, but it was not. I think we were the 4th to be called. We saw her in the arms of a gentleman, oblivious to what was about to happen to her. They called Millers and then I think they said Jiake. I had to work through people to get to her. I thought that I would grab her so quickly and hold her so tightly, but I didn't. I moved slowly to her and slowly took her from their arms. I held her close and looked into her eyes. It was such a look. It was that moment that I gave birth to my little girl.... in a way that is so similar to natural birth. The pain, this time was not the physical pain of giving birth, but a heart pain. I was taking my little girl away from all that she knew, knowing her life will never be the same. It was hard to be overflowing with joy, I think I just pondered it. I was thrilled, excited, joyful, happy, in love, yet I was sad and broken for her.

Much of that day is faded in my mind. There was so much going on and so many emotions that I honestly can't sort through them all.

I look at her now, asleep in the playpen and my heart stops. Much like it does for a woman or father who just gave birth. You stare at your newborn for hours in amazement. The wonders of God fill your mind. Well, it is the same way now. I stare at her and wonder. I am in awe. I love her as much as I love each of my children. It feels like she has always been a part of our family. I can't imagine life wihtout her. ... just like I felt when each of the other four were born.

I look outside to the country she was born into. What an amazing country this is. SHe has a heritage that I hope to always remind her of. It will never be the same, I will never be able to give her the same as if she were living here, but we will not take it away from her. We will remind her of the wonderful things that are a part of who she is. The gifts she has been given by being born Chinese just as we will remind her of the gifts she is given by being grafted into our family. I don't know how it will all effect her. I don't know what identity issues she will face, but I know the one true God who will never leave her nor forsake her, who knows the answers she will be looking for, and who loves her and has held her this whole time. We will teach her of Him and His ways and His truths. When the time comes that Daddy and I can not answer her questions, we pray she will know God to go to Him for those answers.

Is it all worth it? Yes! Becoming a parent, whatever way God plans, is beautiful and a gift. To write it all down is impossible.

I would post pictures, but I left my camera in Mark's car. We had a wonderful Thanksgiving. We spent the day with Mark's family. It was so enjoyable to have everyone together. I took some time to reflect on the year. I know that I should be thankful everyday, but the truth of the matter is that I get focused on life and the day to day "fires" that I tend to forget all that God has blessed me with. Having a day or a season to stop and think about God's blessings is something I cherish. And oh how much I have to be thankful for! With the uncertainty of the economy and all the unknowns of our future... it is easy to become anxious. Sometimes, that anxiousness often masks the blessings that are standing right in front of me. Taking that moment to "count your blessings" tends to push away the anxiousness and help me to rest in the arms of the one who created the heavens and the earth. Nothing is outside of God. And, I am confident that God loves me, that I am His child, and that no matter what, God has not been caught off guard nor has He left my side.

So... to sum it up... I am thankful for my life and ALL that encompasses it.

Last week, Elizabeth had to have blood work drawn. I can't remember if I mentioned it, but she doesn't handle it very well (typical of a 3 year old- but with Elizabeth,things like that seem much more traumatic then a typical 3 year old screaming). She was a trooper for the blood work. We managed to make it out alive and in one piece (though it was quite a workout for mom- she is very, very strong!). We waited the 5 days, only to discover that the wrong lab work was drawn. I couldn't believe it! So... we faced another episode of lab work. Elizabeth tried hard to be brave. She made it up until we walked into the room and sat down. She fought hard, but amazingly, she calmed down some. The first attempt was quite difficult. They put the needle in her arm, but didn't hit the vein and couldn't locate it. Elizabeth actually stopped fighting (though she whimpered quite a bit). They pulled it out and had to try the other arm. Elizabeth was so brave. She cried, but held out her arm and let them draw it. Half way through, she sat somewhat calm in my lap. It was amazing! Anyway, we waited another 5 days for the results.

I got the call yesterday. She is positive for Thalassemia Minor. It is a genetic disorder of the blood. I can't believe how I am almost relieved to hear it. By God's grace, the minor is not life threatening. In fact, we shouldn't have to be too concerned, only when she marries. Her spouse will need to be tested to see if he is a carrier as well. If they both have the genetic disorder, then the chances are very high that they will have a child with Thalassemia Major. That disorder is far more serious and dangerous. We will meet with a genetic counselor in February. They will go over everything with us then. Until then, I am doing a great deal of research on my own.

I had a few questions for the nurse when she called. An hour or so later, the doctor called me. I was surprised. He wanted to be able to share it with me without having a "middleman". He assured me that she will live a long healthy life. He told me that Thalassemia is common world-wide, but in the States, it is not very common. The blood test for it is very simple. If Elizabeth had been african-american, he would have ran a test for sickle-cell anemia after her blood work had originally indicated that she was anemic. But, for Caucasian children, the general consent it to give a child a couple of months of iron supplements and retest to see if the anemia has corrected itself. I think, because Elizabeth is our daughter, I think the fact that she is Asian was not on his mind. The doctor shared with me that when I called his office with suspicions of her having Thalassemia, it triggered it in his mind and he instantly felt she would be positive. I am thankful that someone shared with me about the disorder. I am also very thankful for his honesty and his response to my concern. For awhile, I have felt as if they were perceiving me as an over-reactive parent... blowing things out of proportion (not that that doesn't describe me at times :)).

So, now I am much less concerned about melamine poisoning. My biggest concern about the melamine was her unexplained anemia and the blood pressure checks she was having. The anemia is now explained by the Thalassemia. So, for now, I am at peace. I still want the kidney ultrasounds on both kids. But, I am not expecting the results to be positive for melamine.