I would post pictures, but I left my camera in Mark's car. We had a wonderful Thanksgiving. We spent the day with Mark's family. It was so enjoyable to have everyone together. I took some time to reflect on the year. I know that I should be thankful everyday, but the truth of the matter is that I get focused on life and the day to day "fires" that I tend to forget all that God has blessed me with. Having a day or a season to stop and think about God's blessings is something I cherish. And oh how much I have to be thankful for! With the uncertainty of the economy and all the unknowns of our future... it is easy to become anxious. Sometimes, that anxiousness often masks the blessings that are standing right in front of me. Taking that moment to "count your blessings" tends to push away the anxiousness and help me to rest in the arms of the one who created the heavens and the earth. Nothing is outside of God. And, I am confident that God loves me, that I am His child, and that no matter what, God has not been caught off guard nor has He left my side.

So... to sum it up... I am thankful for my life and ALL that encompasses it.

Last week, Elizabeth had to have blood work drawn. I can't remember if I mentioned it, but she doesn't handle it very well (typical of a 3 year old- but with Elizabeth,things like that seem much more traumatic then a typical 3 year old screaming). She was a trooper for the blood work. We managed to make it out alive and in one piece (though it was quite a workout for mom- she is very, very strong!). We waited the 5 days, only to discover that the wrong lab work was drawn. I couldn't believe it! So... we faced another episode of lab work. Elizabeth tried hard to be brave. She made it up until we walked into the room and sat down. She fought hard, but amazingly, she calmed down some. The first attempt was quite difficult. They put the needle in her arm, but didn't hit the vein and couldn't locate it. Elizabeth actually stopped fighting (though she whimpered quite a bit). They pulled it out and had to try the other arm. Elizabeth was so brave. She cried, but held out her arm and let them draw it. Half way through, she sat somewhat calm in my lap. It was amazing! Anyway, we waited another 5 days for the results.

I got the call yesterday. She is positive for Thalassemia Minor. It is a genetic disorder of the blood. I can't believe how I am almost relieved to hear it. By God's grace, the minor is not life threatening. In fact, we shouldn't have to be too concerned, only when she marries. Her spouse will need to be tested to see if he is a carrier as well. If they both have the genetic disorder, then the chances are very high that they will have a child with Thalassemia Major. That disorder is far more serious and dangerous. We will meet with a genetic counselor in February. They will go over everything with us then. Until then, I am doing a great deal of research on my own.

I had a few questions for the nurse when she called. An hour or so later, the doctor called me. I was surprised. He wanted to be able to share it with me without having a "middleman". He assured me that she will live a long healthy life. He told me that Thalassemia is common world-wide, but in the States, it is not very common. The blood test for it is very simple. If Elizabeth had been african-american, he would have ran a test for sickle-cell anemia after her blood work had originally indicated that she was anemic. But, for Caucasian children, the general consent it to give a child a couple of months of iron supplements and retest to see if the anemia has corrected itself. I think, because Elizabeth is our daughter, I think the fact that she is Asian was not on his mind. The doctor shared with me that when I called his office with suspicions of her having Thalassemia, it triggered it in his mind and he instantly felt she would be positive. I am thankful that someone shared with me about the disorder. I am also very thankful for his honesty and his response to my concern. For awhile, I have felt as if they were perceiving me as an over-reactive parent... blowing things out of proportion (not that that doesn't describe me at times :)).

So, now I am much less concerned about melamine poisoning. My biggest concern about the melamine was her unexplained anemia and the blood pressure checks she was having. The anemia is now explained by the Thalassemia. So, for now, I am at peace. I still want the kidney ultrasounds on both kids. But, I am not expecting the results to be positive for melamine.

Yes, we've had a few snowfalls. It seems rather strange seeing as a week or so ago it was in the 60's. But.. thats the kind of weather we get around here. I took the little ones out yesterday and it was all giggles... almost the entire time. They were funny too watch.


Emily is visiting a college today, Baptist Bible College. It is in Pennsylvania. One of her dear friends was visiting and invited her to tag along. Mark and I thought it was a great opportunity for her to check it out. So far, she has really only checked out OSU branch campuses. Erin went on a trip to the University of Michigan last Friday. She is very interested in ROTC (Yikes!). So interested in that she has put soccer somewhat on the side. That says quite a bit to me!

Well, Elizabeth is calling. I have to sign off.

The kids went to their final storytime at the library yesterday. They got to make a cook Thanksgiving hat. Here are the results:













Continuing with my "difference between boys and girls" theme... check these pictures out. We were making gingerbread men. Ri decided that it was too boring, so he found a bin, grabbed all that he could find from anywhere he wanted and loaded it up. He had tons of fun seeing what all would fit in and then climbing in and covering himself up.




Elizabeth, on the other hand, sat at the kitchen counter measuring every teaspoon, every cup, and stirring until it got too difficult to stir.

continuation of the differences between girls and boys

This may be rather long and boring to most of you, but it's something I'd love for Ri and Elizabeth to have one day. So... bare with me as I write my experience and conversation in the van yesterday morning.

I got the kids clothed and put their shoes on and told them it was time to go. They both put coats on. Elizabeth headed to the door. Ri bent down, grabbed something off the floor and began to walk.. noticed the two big jars full of blocks and ran. Before I knew it, Elizabeth had walked out the door and Ri had grabbed both jars (they are half his size). He had one in each hand and was proudly walking towards the door. We went out and Elizabeth was grabbing snow to eat. Ri wanted to, but that meant he would have to put his jars of blocks down. He decided not to. They both go in the van. I buckled them up, removing each jar as I got his arm under the belt. He insisted on having his jars back. I gave them to him. Then I started the van and drove off. I noticed a funny noise, but ignored it. Elizabeth started singing (she loves to sing). She sang this little "song"... "Everybody jump.. georgyjub georgyjub, everybody jump... goergyjub, georgyjub" and repeated singing it very sweetly and quietly. I heard a rythmic noise that was getting a little louder and wasn't sure where it was coming from. Everytime I looked back, Ri was watching Elizabeth and smiling at me. Elizabeth asked me to sing her song with her and said "everybody sing". Unfortunately, I didn't know this little jingle and couldn't understand who was jumping. I sang anyway. Ri agreed with me and tried to sing it, but he didn't know it either. She sang anyway. The noise continued. Finally, I put two and two together... Ri was moving his legs to the beat of her song... pounding on the jars with his feet. Now that made more sense! Elizabeth continued to sing and talk. This time, she said to me "Mom, guess what?". I said "what". she preceeded to tell me "Your job's safe". I told her I was happy about that. After that, she asked me if I wanted her to sing the Dodger Song (a song from the movie "Oliver"), I did, and so she sang the whole song (what she knows of it). Ri chimed in at the "oooo,oooo,oooo, oooo-ooo's"... still kicking with the rythm of the song. And then, after the song, she named a stuffed animal she was holding. She came up with a very good name but I can't remember it right now. Mainly because she asked Ri what the name of his was. Poor Ri, he didn't answer her quick enough, so she began making suggestions. But, before he could say yes or no, she would give him another suggestion... pleading for him to take that suggestion, but not giving him time to think of whether he wanted it or not. The conversation was completely one sided. It was so funny to listen too.

There is much more, but I forget a lot of it already. So.. I must end my thoughts on our van ride.

As for medical things going on.... we have an US appointment for both Ri and Elizabeth set up for December 18th. I located some bloodwork for Elizabeth taken on June 26. I discovered that they did take the test they would normally take for her kidneys. Her kidneys seem to be functioning fine. That was great to see. But... there were SEVERAL things that had been abnormal (either high, low or abnormal). They had never told us any of that. I guess it all points to her being anemic. Funny thing is, when our doctor sent her for a specific test for iron, she was not iron-deficient. Well, after posting something about her labwork to my melamine group, someone asked me a few more questions. Now... we are heading down another path of testing. There is a little one from China who matches up to almost every labwork that Elizabeth was low, high, or abnormal on. She has been diagnosed with a genetic disorder called thalassemia. It is an inherited disease of red blood cells, and is highly prevalent among South East Asian and Mediterranean populace.(I took this info from a website:V)

I have been trying to research the melamine stuff as thoroughly as possible. But, now I am researching this new condition. She may not have it. She is anemic and has been since we brought her home. She is not iron deficient, which is what most doctors will assume when a patient is anemic. These are 2 things that are very characteristic of thalassemia. Because this condition is not common in the states, I think it gets over looked. But since Elizabeth's labwork matched up so closely with the little girl who definitely has been diagnosed with thalassemia, I think it warrants my pushing for some more answers. So, that is the route I am going as of now. We hope to have some genetic testing done the same day we have the ultrasounds done on the kids.


And that is how our life is around the Miller home. As my dear friend Christy reminded me.... Us Millers do not do normal things. We like to be a little different. I think Elizabeth is just trying to fit in well!

I do rejoice in the God of heaven and earth. I have enjoyed the time I have had with the little ones at bedtime. It amazes me that when the older 4 were little, Mark and I rarely missed a night reading a bible story or something like that. We purposely taught our children about who God is and how He is a part of our lives on a day to day basis. Somehow, with the chaos of life, we have lost that simple act. I took a moment one day and realized that I have missed so many wonderful opportunities with Ri and Elizabeth. I talk about God with them all the time, but I haven't found... or maybe the better word is "taken" the time to read on a day to day basis. I don't mean read simple books, but actually read the bible. The power truly is in the word of God. In fact, reading to them at bedtime rarely happened. So many things go on at that time of night that I just didn't sit down and have a routine of reading. So... a few months ago, I started to take time at night and read them stories; but not from the Bible. The kids loved it. They loved sitting beside me and reading a book. It was precious time that I should have taken long ago. A few weeks ago, I decided that it was time that I purposely began reading the bible to them... whether they understood it or not. I found a very old Childrens Bible Story series... you know... those big blue books that you use to see in the doctors office or some place like that when you were growing up. I remember them! The very look of them turned me off, probably because I remember them so long ago. Anyway, I picked it up and started reading Old Testament stories. To my surprise, both kids laid still and listened; so I kept on reading. Story after story, the kids have laid down and listened to it. It is finally becoming something they are kind of expecting. Oh, they can't tell me everything I read, but for now... they know there is a prophet of God named Elijah who obeyed God and told a king something he didn't want to hear. We've read of fire from heaven and even of dogs eating Jezebel! Talk about a gruesome bedtime story! Tonight we read about Elisha and we read how Elijah was taken up to heaven in a chariot of fire. What cool stories for the kids to hear. The neat thing.. they are truth. Even more... they are the words of the living God.

So, tonight, I rejoice in His word and for finally finding a way to make it a part of an everyday thing for my precious little ones. It's not just mommy and daddy talkig about God, but it's now them hearing the word of God regularly.

I also thought I would share with you that I am having more peace about the melamine. Yes, it is very possible that she was exposed. It is possible that she was even effected. I don't like either thought. But I am not as panicked. I am not as fearful. I am more at peace. I know i am doing all that I can do for her. I am researching, reading, contacting anyone and everyone I think who can help be an advocate for her health as well as any other kids in our community who might have been exposed. As of now, she has had 4 blood pressure screenings. None are normal, but not all are readings that should concern me. Her readings have been:
November 7th (morning): 116/72
November 10th (morning): 112/54
November 13th (morning): 106/54
November 13th (afternoon): 110/64

BAsed on a table I was sent by an adoption doctor, she is in phase 1 of hypertension for a 3 year old in the 30th percentile of her height. But... my family doctor has said her blood pressure is perfectly normal and a pediatrician we saw today said he was not concerned with her readings. We were told that she is anemic, she does experience nose bleeds at times (which may or may not be do to the blood pressure).
I had desparately wanted a urinalysis and blood work done on her as well as a kidney ultrasound. The doctor ran a UA on her and it was without protein. I am not sure if they did anything else with it. But... in July, we had gone to the ER for abdominal pain with Elizabeth. A series of bloodwork was drawn as well as a complete UA. The UA did not show any blood (yeah!) They also had ran the blood work that I have been begging our doctor to do. Yeah! I didn't realize we had already had it done. I got those reports today and am a little confused with them. I think, after having searched the internet, that her kidneys appear to be working great. One test they do for melamine is a Bun/Creatine. Her Bun was normal and her creatine was low. At first I thought that was bad, but I am now thinking that it is fine. I think the concern is when the creatine is elevated. Who knows, though. I am not a doctor! But for tonight, I rest at ease. We have an ultrasound scheduled for December 18th. I will look forward to that test. I think right now it is more for my peace of mind.

Uncle Paul.. here is the name of the skin disorder she has right now: pityriasis lichenoides et varioliformis acuta

Now it is Ri's turn. What a precious little boy he is. I think I can finally say that I am completely thrilled with having two 3 year olds! They are so much fun to watch and be around. Their imaginations are amazing. Everyday holds something new for them to explore and "create".


I also think I can safely say that I am doing ok with my emotions and fears. I know that all of my children are in God's hands and nothings happens to them without His allowing it to happen. Oh, things might happen that I do not want to go through or want to see my children go through.... but I am confident that God has a plan and a purpose for each of us. I just have to hold onto Him and trust Him.

Today, my heart is focused on my little girl. I have looked at her all day and just longed to hold her tight. And so, my photos are focusing on the face of my precious baby.







And, just like Elizabeth,... today, at least, I felt like crying. Oh there is no real reason to be emotional. No facts or truth that causes me to cry. But, for today, I have seemed to let go of my faith and held on to my fears. Today, I have focused more on the "what ifs" instead of focusing on God's gifts.

Sometimes, my emotions seem to win. Sometimes, I seemd to completely forget that the God of the universe is holding my little girl in the palm of His hand and that NOTHING will happen to her that isn't for her best. And so I have caught myself staring at her, loving her deeper then I could imagine, longing to protect her from anything that could harm her.... longing to protect her from life.

It seems that I have allowed my thoughts to take control. A while ago, I posted about the melamine poisoining in China. Since then, I have begun to do as much research as I can. As I have done that, my fears have begun to take over. You see, the fact is that Elizabeth drank the formula that was found with the highest amount of melamine in it for 10 1/2 months. What we do not know is whether the company had been adding the melamine at this time. There is evidence that indicates that the adding of melamine has been going on for more then 2 years as first suggested. There are children who were adopted in 2004 who have tested positive for kidney stones.

You see, the melamine can cause kidney stones in children. Unfortunately, the stones are not the normal stones. It is unclear at this point (at least to me), all the ramifications of the chemical additive. ... but many are ones I fear. The stones have causes kidney and renal failure, resulting in death. There is also suspect of cancer and other complications.

Some children have symptoms with the stones, others do not have any symptoms and still have stones. At this point, I am not sure if Elizabeth has any signs or not. My mind says "definitely", but I realize that I am becoming consumed and too focused... yet, this is my precious child ... whom I would give my life for.

Up until Friday, I only has some speculations, some possible concerns, but most that could be ignored. But Friday morning, Elizabeth's blood pressure was high. It easily could be just from fear (though she was very calm). It was 116/72, which is high for a child of 3 years old. It put her almost in the 99th percentile (stage 2 of hypertension). I realized, though, that you can determine something like that with one reading of blood pressure. But... the nurse went through the symptoms of melamine poisoning and high blood pressue is one of the symptoms. Still, I was able to disregard it somewhat. But this morning, I was reading what the next testing would be if she had 3 regular BP testings that recorded her in the stage 1 or stage 2hypertension. One step is to order a CBC to determine if she is anemic. I read on because she IS anemic. She has had low iron since we brought her home. Then the next words sent my stomach in a whirlwind. The reason they want to rule out anemia is because anemia is a possible indicator of renal disease!!! Yikes! Now she quickly went to 2 things that scared me... high blood pressure and anemia! Another symptom is abdominal pain and ridgedness. I then remembered a trip to the ER a few months ago with unexplained rigid tummy and pain. Three strikes! So.. my mind started imagining all kinds of things.

By the grace of God, I called a precious friend and was able to talk most of my fears out. My mind is still struggling with it all, but I am much closer to being able to lay it all at God's feet once again. God loves my little girl far more then I do. So, I know she is in the best hands possible. He will hold her through anything He chooses to allow her to go through.

This afternoon, on top of all my thoughts, we finally were able to see a dermatologist for her rash. If you remember, 7 weeks or so ago, she was diagnosed with chicken pox. 4 weeks later, she still had them. I thought they had gone away, but they hadn't. We saw the doctor again and Elizabeth was put on steroids. That worked a few days, but it came right back. They decided it was not chicken pox. The dermatologist checked her out and it appears she has a very rare rash. The name is so long that I can't pronounce it... .let alone remember it. I will get the info tomorrow morning on that one. Funny thing is that it is rare AND there is no explanation how someone gets it. It is not contageous, but noone knows its origin. Guess where my mind went?

Well, I have to get some sleep. Enjoy the pictures of my girl. And for those of you who have trusted Jesus Christ as your savior, ... please, please pray for her (and for me that i might be able to keep it at His feet rather then take the burden on myself).

Boy is he proud of his work!
Here is a close up of Ri's picture. He was so proud of himself! I think he did an incredible job!!!
He thought it was great fun drawing faces, so he drew a few more. I don't think he took as much time on them. But.. check out his matching of the shapes. :)

Elizabeth was very proud of her work, so she asked me to take a close picture. We started out with the letter "O" and made a picture from it. She made a face.
If you remember the post from yesterday, here is the baby that Elizabeth "found in the woods". Funny... when Elizabeth brought her to me, she didnt' have any clothes on. That concerned Elizabeth, so she ran upstairs and found clothes for her baby to wear. Too cute.
Both Ri and Elizabeth have imaginations that warm my heart. They can play with just about anything. One of their favorite things to play with are Erin's beanie babies. They carry them around everyday and imagine all sorts of things. Here Ri is having his bear go down the slide ahead of him. They both giggled as they watched it fly down the slide.
Monday night was Erin's soccer banquet for school. I have to admit that it was a very enjoyable evening. Normally, banquets are rather boring and long and drawn out. But this one was much more fun. There were highlights of the games playing while people arrived and while they ate. As people were finishing, they began the awards. Both of the coaches talked about each girl. It was nice. It wasn't long and drawn, just simple and fun to hear. Then they had the team awards and then the OCC awards. I enjoyed watching each girl who was chosen. Erin's dream since Freshmen year was to be selected to the First Team All OCC. It is a very big honor. Someone told me that the First Team is the top 11 kids in the Conference. I am not sure if it is or not, but it certainly is quite an honor. Erin was selected. The joy that came over her was priceless. She had achieved her goal and now can add it to her resume for colleges. Right now, there are 2 colleges that we are aware of that are intersted in watching her a little closer. One is hoping Erin can find a guest team to play in North Carolina in December. That is our goal as well. If so, there are many, many college coaches who will be there; specifically from a few of the schools that she would like to consider attending.

Emily is working her tail off these days. I think it is beginning to get to her just a little. She is working every day after school for 2 hours. Every other Monday evening, she then cleans a business office. On Tuesday's after work, she goes to the church and babysits for 3 hours (SEVERAL kids!). Wednesday, she goes to work and then to youth group (sometimes she has a leadership meeting before). Thursdays, she goes to work after school and then drives 20 minutes to work for the pizza shop for 4 hours. Fridays, she works after school. She either works Friday night or Saturday night at the pizza shop. We are so proud of her efforts and what she is doing. But, on top of the full schedule, she is trying to figure out school for next year... scared to death about it all... figuring out scholarship applications, filling out an application to intern in Philidelphia (the street ministry that she attended last year) for the summer and figuring out the dating thing. She is very busy! She makes us smile. What a wonderful young lady she is!

Sam is finally getting a breather in life. He has been raking for the youth group every night after school, but once he gets home, he has some down time. It is nice. Jacob is keeping very busy as well. He is determined that he will attend Oxford University when he graduates. With that goal in mind, he figures he needs to be involved in all kinds of different things. So... he is in the chest club, jazz band, and math counts (a math club). He ends up walking to my parents house (an hour walk) after each of the activities because Emily does not get done until 5:00 to pick him up. What a great attitude he has about it too! I can't wait to see what God's plan is for this young man.

Some things happen and I forget to write them down and then life grabs hold of me and eventually I forget it all together. This morning, one of those things I want to remember happened, and so I wanted to share it before I forgot.

Elizabeth and Ri came running in to me, smiles on both their faces. Elizabeth was holding a baby doll, lovingly and very tight against her. She had a smile on her face and said "she was all alone in the woods, and I found her". It took me a minute to realize what she had said. I had been deep in thought about Elizabeth's orphange at that moment, having read a story about how the kids are abandoned and the the issues they not only face from that but from some things that happened in the orphanage. I realized what she said and then really listened. She continued to tell me that the baby was all alone and how she picked her up and brought her to her home. She told me that she gave her milk and she needed to love her. It was so sweet. We talked about how the baby was left alone, but how much Elizabeth would love her and take of her and how God loved the baby even though she was left alone.

I am sure that she didn't realize what all she was saying, but to me... it hit a cord within me, reminding me of my little girl.

As I write, Elizabeth has sat her baby in a chair and asked her what movie she wants to watch. Then after putting the movie on, she picked the baby up, held her close and sat in the chair with her. Too cute.

I have been without my good camera for a few days, so the pictures from Halloween weren't what I would have liked... but I suppose I am on the pickier side. :( We had fun watching the kids. All the kids have been fun to watch this fall. Obviously, Elizabeth and Ri are the key trick-or-treaters. They don't care about their costumes, they just looked at the pile I had and chose. There was really no thought put into it. Ri decided to be a tiger (even though the costume is getting a little small) and Elizabeth wanted to be the horse (actually, the rider... but who wants to argue with a 3 year old?) They were easy. Jacob, who is 12, still wanted to dress up and go out with the kids trick-or-treating. I love that. I am thrilled that he still wants to do it. I've never put much effort into the costume thing. It isnt' that I don't want to, but I never want to spend that kind of money all at one time, so I have never really pushed anything. The kids have all been incredible about it. They all have come up with things on their own. Jacob has figured out things for himself for the past 3-4 years. I am so proud of him. This year, he was determined to be something with Star Trek. He never asked my help, just looked around the house to find something he could use. He found a blue shirt that would work for Spok. We had a few issues at first because the color was not exact (my boy likes to be as exact as possible), but he evenutally accepted the fact that he wasn't going to get anything better. The ears were a BIG issue. In fact, they caused quite a fight between him and I. He had no idea what to use. Mark and I looked for a few hours and couldn't come up with anything. Spok ears??? Wow - it was a challenge! But, we came up with an idea. It really worked well, ocnsidering what we had to work with. But Jacob was really struggling with it. After arguing for an hour on his hair, his ears and his emblem on the shirt, we finally were set to go.... but 15 minutes before we walked out the door, Jacob realized that his clothes were in Emily's car (which left 5 mintues earlier). It was then that I truly lost my temper. I made him hop in the car with me and then preceeded to let him know what I thought of his irresponsibility. Poor guy. Mom's wrath is not fun! My disappointment was right, but my anger was very sinful. Ugh. I really, really, really hate it when I lose it with my kids. I felt horrible about it all. By the time we got his costume and put him together, he didn't want to go anymore. I knew it was because of me. I forced him to go. It took a few minutes, but he finally had fun. He never actually went to a door, but he enjoyed walking and hanging out with his brother and sister. Sam went as well. He was dressed as a ganster (and looked pretty cool), but decided to take it off just before we walked out to go trick or treat. I guess he's getting old :(.